The results, as they say, are in.

Thank you for all the kind comments and phone calls and e-mails – I really (truly) appreciated it over the last couple days. 

We got Lily’s results today, and her sweat test was negative.  This means (according to the genetic counselor with whom we spoke afterward) there is a “99.99999 etc.” chance that our baby doesn’t have cystic fibrosis.  Those are odds I can live with.  She is  carrier for the genetic disease, which means that her kids could have the disease if she marries somebody who is also a carrier.

I am, as you will imagine, enormously relieved (to say the least).  I did manage to wait until after we left the sweat lab to burst into relieved tears.  Tim and I are undergoing more extensive genetic testing in case we decide to have more children, but we are pretty sure he is a carrier and that I’m not since I was tested for the most common CF mutations when I was pregnant the first time.  Lily has the most common (delta F508) mutation.

There was another couple at the hospital with a newborn who was to undergo a sweat test as well.  Judging by the huge bags under their eyes and their looks of intense sorrow, we think they were coming to the sweat test lab with two mutations - to confirm that their baby has CF.  My heart aches for them, and for any family who has to deal with a devastating illness or disability of any kind. We were lucky, but there are many who aren’t.

We are lucky – we know that.  Our luck could change at any second.  I’m left with a bit of a scar – I guess it can go along with the stretch marks that formed while I was carrying Lily.  Maybe the fibrous scars of pregnancy and childbirth are just there to give us some kind of physical proof of all the emotional hits we take when we decide to procreate.